Halt.

I had an enquiry recently by a lovely man who beguiled me with his first email.  The second email wasn’t as pleasant when it felt like he was questioning my sexual health and whether or not I have security cameras.  It irritates me when men don’t know how to convey their questions in a manner that is not insulting.

Prostitution is how I pay for my life.  This being the case and considering my sexual health is paramount to both myself and my guests I take our safety seriously.  I have all manner of tests every six weeks.  I have never had an STD.

While I can sympathise with the very real fear some men might have when it comes to finding the right courtesan – the only way you are going to know for sure that you are safe is to stay home.  And while I am having a wee whinge – your name.  Andy.  Bob.  John.  I don’t give a tinkers cuss what your name is but trust me when I tell you that telling me your real name does not put you in immediate danger of me following you home to report your misgivings to your wife.  I have better things to do and unlike doctors – First Do No Harm … that is my ethos.  Just be you.

If there is one woman in the world that you can trust, its me.  You can just be yourself.  Tell me your story.  I am curious.  I want to know you.  I would never do anything to hurt another human being.  Now, let’s discuss whether or not I have a security camera.

I have a security camera.  It is for my safety.  I am putting my life in your hands.  I am trusting that you will be honourable.  You being afraid that I might keep a still photo from the camera is a lot different from me being afraid you will want to hurt me.  Do you understand? Your fear is different from my fear and yet still I welcome you into my home.

I maintain that every man who finds his way here was always meant to.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk. haha.  Sorry for the rant.  xx