Our Secret Selves.

What are you thinking about at the moment of orgasm? This question was recently posed to me by an Auckland Dom who was trying to get inside my head.  And yes, it got me thinking.  What are my triggers? This, of course, started me down a road I want to explore more deeply.

I have often believed that we are drawn first by those early sexual experiences. Whatever triggered that will hold our attention for the rest of our lives.  For me, it was being spanked – I associated it with a tingling feeling on my bottom that was actually quite pleasurable.

Recently I have been enjoying the company of a lover who has a particular kink.  Seeing me has also meant he is living a secret life away from his partner.  I indulge his kink and even find my level of arousal matching his as I explore it myself.  I watch his face and feel his breath quicken which in turn arouses me so we feed on it and feed on it until the feast is devoured.

Anyway, we talked about secret lives which led to a discussion about our secret selves.  The side of us that we usually keep under lock and key – the side that we might not even dare to acknowledge for fear we will feel shame.  Shame.  It is a word that has no place in sex.

Even today I asked a client if it is different depending on whether he is masturbating or if he is fucking.  Is the orgasm from the feeling you have when my mouth or cunt is wrapped around your cock different from the orgasm you have when you play with your cock? The answer was yes.  Interesting.

Feelings versus thinklings.  I am going to ponder this more.  If I have anything more useful to add I will come back and let you know.

 

/by

What To Expect.

I try my best not to have any expectations when he arrives at my door.  I try to remember this sexual experience is not actually about me, it is about him.  Sometimes I blur the lines I’ll admit.

Arrive on time. 

This is always a positive sign that you respect my time.  Obviously, life happens sometimes and being late cannot be avoided but I do expect to be informed.  My time is just as valuable as yours and you need understand that.

Smell great. 

I love a man who knows that scent is important.  Take care to bathe before you arrive, make the effort and be rewarded.  I expect clean but happily provide bathroom amenities to those who haven’t had time to prepare.

The paperwork.

When you come into my ‘office’ you are presented with the opportunity to hand over the paperwork for our time together.  I may or may not ask for it immediately – I shouldn’t have to.  I prefer it to be placed on my bedside.  I’ll not count it.  I don’t need to.

Await instruction.

I have my ways.  I like my men to remove their clothes and lie on that side of the bed.  I want to look into your eyes and touch your belly before I take cock in hand or mouth.  Wait for me.

Talk to me.

Ask me anything.  I have no reason to lie so I don’t.  I am an open book just waiting to be read.  By the same token, tell me anything you want me to understand.  I am by nature empathetic.  Many’s the time I have laid with men who were brave enough to bare their souls.

Allow me.

I am a professional whore.  My understanding of all things sexual may be greater than most but I am still learning too.  When it comes to my own inner exploration I have come to realise a few things about myself that I will share in another blog update.

Let me guide you along the way.  This isn’t to say that you don’t have a voice.  You do, and I want you to use it.  Tell me what triggers you have.  Tell me your darkest deepest secrets.  I mean, if you can’t tell me you can’t tell anyone, right? And those are the ones that interest me.

Indulge me.

I have my own triggers.  Want to arouse me? Kiss me.  I can orgasm from kiss alone once I am aroused.  And once I am aroused I don’t want it to stop.  Many’s the time a client has left and I will lie there and continue to orgasm and gush and pant and fuck myself because I am not done yet.

Relax

After you have enjoyed your time with me you are welcome to take a shower and use any of the toiletries provided.  I like to think I have thought of everything.

 

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